My Perspective Changed From a Hospital Bed:

Funny, that when I was getting evaluated for discharge, they asked me if I was feeling suicidal or something to that effect, and I was puzzled by the question. I said (according to my wife) "I came to the hospital because I thought I was dying. Why would I go and undue all that work you guys did?" I guess that was a good answer.

Then one of the male RN's helped me into the wheelchair and said, "Dude, I love Deep Purple." I was kinda stunned by his comment and he must have noticed my blank stare, but I agreed. he said "You sang like an entire deep purple album while you were here..."

My reply (again according to my wife) was, "Oh holy poop...please tell me at the very least i was singing in tune!"

My RN also told me I kept repeating a phrase, followed by crazy laughter - "Your birthday coming up??? Didn't you just have it??? Where the Intercourse am I??? Whose pajamas are these???"

Several staff members from other floors referred to me as "The 5150" (Meaning Mental/Suicide Detainee) because they thought I was there for losing my mind, but losing my mind was a pre-existing condition not covered by my current health plan...
 
Robert Herndon said:
Man, you are the stand-out bluesman there!!!!
Click to expand...
Hehe, well Bergen has quite a few good blues players too. The music scene here is thriving; lots of variety.

I just saw these guys playing last Friday. Two of the guys work at a bar I frequent quite often, called Apollon. It is actually a record store that serves beer. An awesome place!

 
Robert Herndon said:
Funny, that when I was getting evaluated for discharge, they asked me if I was feeling suicidal or something to that effect, and I was puzzled by the question. I said (according to my wife) "I came to the hospital because I thought I was dying. Why would I go and undue all that work you guys did?" I guess that was a good answer.

Then one of the male RN's helped me into the wheelchair and said, "Dude, I love Deep Purple." I was kinda stunned by his comment and he must have noticed my blank stare, but I agreed. he said "You sang like an entire deep purple album while you were here..."

My reply (again according to my wife) was, "Oh holy poo...please tell me at the very least i was singing in tune!"

My RN also told me I kept repeating a phrase, followed by crazy laughter - "Your birthday coming up??? Didn't you just have it??? Where the intercoarse am I??? Whose pajamas are these???"

Several staff members from other floors referred to me as "The 5150" (Meaning Mental/Suicide Detainee) because they thought I was there for losing my mind, but losing my mind was a pre-existing condition not covered by my current health plan...
Click to expand...
 
These guys are very nice -- "normal" family types when home----
who spend more time WORKING OUT than they do anything else!!! lol
misfits.jpg
 
Im thankful to God for good news. My poor family was terrified. My Mom almost j ad a nervous breakdown. I'm so relieved!
 
Rob remember this, our love of music and guitar is suppose to sooth the savage beast, not kill us.
Glad to hear you are on the mend.
Please . . . slow your roll a bit. None of us want to see you going through this again.
 
Robert Herndon said:
Im thankful to God for good news. My poor family was terrified. My Mom almost j ad a nervous breakdown. I'm so relieved!
Click to expand...
Family always seem to get way more worried than we do. We’re guys after all. It’s what we do..... or don’t do. About 7 years ago I managed to scare the poop out of my bride. Enough so, she called an ambulance. Weekend in the hospital and I was better.
 
Damn man! I hadn't seen this thread. Hope all is well now and wish you a good recovery.

Look, I suffer a lot from stress and anxiety, and meditation and the study of Buddhism as a philosophy of life (not as a religion, I'm not a religious man) has helped me a LOT.
 
ChasFred said:
Rob remember this, our love of music and guitar is suppose to sooth the savage beast, not kill us.
Glad to hear you are on the mend.
Please . . . slow your roll a bit. None of us want to see you going through this again.
Click to expand...

Oh! Slow is not the word for my week! I haven't shaved since Monday morning (but shower daily) and yesterday was my first day that I drove myself a little.
 
I am beyond touched by each and every one of your responses. As a fellow who knows many - I call a small handful friends - so without saying I am closer to you here than to many I see daily.

It has been brought to my attention that I may have - at least to some extent - failed to see the seriousness of my condition by choosing to write/hum/record on my phone some manner of song during this event.

Since it is never my desire to offend anyone, I feel obliged to address the little song that was born out of this life event.

I think perhaps no one is more aware of the enormity - and potential peril in my situation today - than myself. I've had so much free time to just rest/recover that it borders on maddening. Nonetheless, I have stuck by the doctorsorders and recovery is a rapid process.

For me, as strange as I may seem, with every life event, therein lies a song. I have been an aspiring musician andsongwriter since the age of 9. I saw this situation as nodifferent.

Some may not chose to write of such an event. Some might even decry it as morbid, or self-destructive, perhaps even obtuse. But, for me, every life event is a creative opportunity, even the dark days.

This song - which will eventually have words that have nothing to do with Morphine - was simply named after the drug as a means of identifying it as it had no lyrical structure.

The song structure was hummed into my cell phone during a period in which I was delirious from the onset ofseptic shock, heavily sedated and - quite literally - believed (at that moment and in that state) that I was going to die.

My checklist for death was simple.

1. Text each member of my family to say that I love them.

2. Sending 11 year oldQuinten's mother texts to be revealed to him at his high school graduation, college graduation, wedding, first child, first job and first heartbreak.

3. Try and compose my 'Swan Song' and tell my oldest son to see it through to completion.

I do not endorse drug use, but I have to tell you, that from my perspective, the siren's call of heroin (an opioid derivative) - which had always been a mystery to me - became suddenly clear....as is the reason we lost Nowell, Hendrix, Joplin, Weiland, and so many others.

Just one brief experience with opioids and I wanted more. The peace. The quietness of thought. The euphoria. It is incredible - and to such a degree that without it - is a huge psychological and physiological let down.

I know now why we have lost so many needlessly.

I feel it almost a collective waste not to create from that glimpse into the abyss....
 
ChasFred said:
Rob remember this, our love of music and guitar is suppose to sooth the savage beast, not kill us.
Glad to hear you are on the mend.
Please . . . slow your roll a bit. None of us want to see you going through this again.
Click to expand...

And I always try to make light of my bad situations or I think I would go crazy...not that I don't see them as serious...
 
Hope all is well now Robert. Last Monday I got the worst Flu in my life still fighting it if it was not for my private Doctor I would be in the hospital
I had to cancel all the gigs for this month and I won't allow anyone around me I don't wish this Flu or whatever it is on anyone.
 
67plexi said:
Hope all is well now Robert. Last Monday I got the worst Flu in my life still fighting it if it was not for my private Doctor I would be in the hospital
I had to cancel all the gigs for this month and I won't allow anyone around me I don't wish this Flu or whatever it is on anyone.
Click to expand...

I'm better, man.. thank you for asking...Hope you are doing OK!!!!!
 
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