TTR Game of Toanz

had company over last night so limited forum time. But can I say now fellas... you are all deserving of rock star status at this point. That and possibly some variety of mental illness diagnosis, but it comes with the territory.

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We are still waiting for reviews of the performances by @mcblink "Heinous Anus and FiveSkin" and @Headache "Sexxx Tank" and WhoreMouth
not holding much hope for @Mr. Potato Head and Lysol's outfit Shallow Grave but, maybe he will come through
DEADLINE TONIGHT

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@LRT is still in this too…right? Or…did he already post? I don’t think so…
@Mitch Pearrow SJMP
@LiveeviL2000
@Jethro Rocker
@4406Pack
@SG John
@myself
…we’re in…
Waiting on
@mcblink
@Headache
@LRT
…and @Mr. Potato Head …if he resurrects…

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Last Saturday’s Sex Toys for the Disabled fundraising event was a musical feast, and a tribal triumph! But, it was also very nearly a horrific human disaster. First to take the stage was a group of bigfoot-costume clad men who very effectively brandished their unique brand of yeti-rock in an abominable way that anyone in attendance shan't soon forget. Their shrieks and moans eventually attracted an actual Bigfoot who entered the venue and began swallowing up nearly all the alcohol in stock. It then took the stage and stole the show from the boys, and eventually "consummated" the occasion with one of the band members right there on stage, to the delight of the fans, and to the dismay of the band member. Next up was the "swinging package" of the event, FIVESKIN. They took the stage balls out. Roping the audience in, they ripped through their first song and they had everyone's attention. It was a brutal set that nearly caused the divide between the fans of both groups to spill over into violence, with both groups being tightly wound up and ready to fight each other. Luckily, the members of FIVESKIN has in fact, experienced this reaction before, and they have measures to prevent this and to and calm the crowd. Many bands make use of the smoke machine for on-stage theatrics, but not like FIVESKIN does. Their machines are designed to fill venues with cannabis smoke, and within minutes, the crowd forgets their animosities towards each other and instead, they come together in the name of peace, love, happiness, and good tunes. It turned out to be a lovely evening with great bands and most importantly, much money raised to help the disabled get better access to...well, you know. The money DEFINITELY didn't go to pay for any of the band's meals, or drugs, or anything like that... for sure... really...

-Cyrillic Sneer

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Last Saturday’s Sex Toys for the Disabled fundraising event was a musical feast, and a tribal triumph! But, it was also very nearly a horrific human disaster. First to take the stage was a group of bigfoot-costume clad men who very effectively brandished their unique brand of yeti-rock in an abominable way that anyone in attendance shan't soon forget. Their shrieks and moans eventually attracted an actual Bigfoot who entered the venue and began swallowing up nearly all the alcohol in stock. It then took the stage and stole the show from the boys, and eventually "consummated" the occasion with one of the band members right there on stage, to the delight of the fans, and to the dismay of the band member. Next up was the "swinging package" of the event, FIVESKIN. They took the stage balls out. Roping the audience in, they ripped through their first song and they had everyone's attention. It was a brutal set that nearly caused the divide between the fans of both groups to spill over into violence, with both groups being tightly wound up and ready to fight each other. Luckily, the members of FIVESKIN has in fact, experienced this reaction before, and they have measures to prevent this and to and calm the crowd. Many bands make use of the smoke machine for on-stage theatrics, but not like FIVESKIN does. Their machines are designed to fill venues with cannabis smoke, and within minutes, the crowd forgets their animosities towards each other and instead, they come together in the name of peace, love, happiness, and good tunes. It turned out to be a lovely evening with great bands and most importantly, much money raised to help the disabled get better access to...well, you know. The money DEFINITELY didn't go to pay for any of the band's meals, or drugs, or anything like that... for sure... really...

-Cyrillic Sneer

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Hahahahahahahaha! Thank you for not branding the wounded soul that actually managed to collect the first documented batch of Samsquanch DNA evidence…You sir…are too kind. :rolf: :facepalm:
 
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Last Saturday’s Sex Toys for the Disabled fundraising event was a musical feast, and a tribal triumph! But, it was also very nearly a horrific human disaster. First to take the stage was a group of bigfoot-costume clad men who very effectively brandished their unique brand of yeti-rock in an abominable way that anyone in attendance shan't soon forget. Their shrieks and moans eventually attracted an actual Bigfoot who entered the venue and began swallowing up nearly all the alcohol in stock. It then took the stage and stole the show from the boys, and eventually "consummated" the occasion with one of the band members right there on stage, to the delight of the fans, and to the dismay of the band member. Next up was the "swinging package" of the event, FIVESKIN. They took the stage balls out. Roping the audience in, they ripped through their first song and they had everyone's attention. It was a brutal set that nearly caused the divide between the fans of both groups to spill over into violence, with both groups being tightly wound up and ready to fight each other. Luckily, the members of FIVESKIN has in fact, experienced this reaction before, and they have measures to prevent this and to and calm the crowd. Many bands make use of the smoke machine for on-stage theatrics, but not like FIVESKIN does. Their machines are designed to fill venues with cannabis smoke, and within minutes, the crowd forgets their animosities towards each other and instead, they come together in the name of peace, love, happiness, and good tunes. It turned out to be a lovely evening with great bands and most importantly, much money raised to help the disabled get better access to...well, you know. The money DEFINITELY didn't go to pay for any of the band's meals, or drugs, or anything like that... for sure... really...

-Cyrillic Sneer

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"Cyrillic" Sneer...
Damned autocorrect! Bit me in the ass again lol
 
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Last Saturday’s Sex Toys for the Disabled fundraising event was a musical feast, and a tribal triumph! But, it was also very nearly a horrific human disaster. First to take the stage was a group of bigfoot-costume clad men who very effectively brandished their unique brand of yeti-rock in an abominable way that anyone in attendance shan't soon forget. Their shrieks and moans eventually attracted an actual Bigfoot who entered the venue and began swallowing up nearly all the alcohol in stock. It then took the stage and stole the show from the boys, and eventually "consummated" the occasion with one of the band members right there on stage, to the delight of the fans, and to the dismay of the band member. Next up was the "swinging package" of the event, FIVESKIN. They took the stage balls out. Roping the audience in, they ripped through their first song and they had everyone's attention. It was a brutal set that nearly caused the divide between the fans of both groups to spill over into violence, with both groups being tightly wound up and ready to fight each other. Luckily, the members of FIVESKIN has in fact, experienced this reaction before, and they have measures to prevent this and to and calm the crowd. Many bands make use of the smoke machine for on-stage theatrics, but not like FIVESKIN does. Their machines are designed to fill venues with cannabis smoke, and within minutes, the crowd forgets their animosities towards each other and instead, they come together in the name of peace, love, happiness, and good tunes. It turned out to be a lovely evening with great bands and most importantly, much money raised to help the disabled get better access to...well, you know. The money DEFINITELY didn't go to pay for any of the band's meals, or drugs, or anything like that... for sure... really...

-Cyrillic Sneer

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Sex toys for the disabled.... my lord lmao
 
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Last Saturday’s to keep kids off drugs fundraising event was a musical feast, and a tribal triumph! But, it was also very nearly a horrific human disaster.” The opening act Squancher put on a great show, had the crowds moshing and starting to tear down the place. The light show was something of it's own with fog machines running hard. This event was ment to keep kids off drugs but all around you could see clouds of pot somke in the air. At one point the guy next to me asked if I wanted any shrooms. Had to awnser with hell ya but I got to play my set before eating them. So he hands me a bag and I go heading for the backrooms. There had been many flyers handed out to promote this event this helped to pack the venue.

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Now it's our time to get up on stage and the announcer blares out NOW ON STAGE IS ICED SLOTH. We are all shaking in our boots hoping for this to go well. We get tuned up and go to hit it off. Bones clicks us in and he now can't seem to count to 3 and everything just starts to fall apart. I'm thinking poop so I do my best to hold the rhythm together. Suddenly Fire Slot jumps in and it sounded like a dying rabbit. Eventually we all start to come together and things are sounding good. I look out into the crowd and notice a reporter for the happenings magazine was out there


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I'm thinking great now I have to read the article.

I find the article and do a quick read through. She goes on to talk about how well Squatcher had performed and the went on to say how off we were in the start. She explained how once we pulled it together the crowd really started to feel it. She also talked about the hole reasons she was there was to support keeping kids off drugs. She mentioned about how she couldn't believe how everybody was doing drugs in the crowd.
Well that was our first show what a mess
 
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“Last Saturday’s "Prostitute 4 Childhood cancer" fundraising event was a musical feast, and a tribal triumph! But, it was also very nearly a horrific human disaster.”
Wow what an event we got signed up for... All the ladies giving their monies for duties provided all day long so that little kids can battle cancer! It's so beautiful it almost brings a tear to our eyes as we walk into the back room by mistake and see what's going on with our own eyes! Yikes !
What did our uncle sign us up for?
We watched Squincher play a great set, tight, dirty, loud and ballsy. We knew we had our work cut out for us so we could even barely compete with these guys!
As we pounded through our set we decided to try the pyro trick, setting my legs on fire with a thin coat of fire gel..... But it didn't work out like we planned it.
Starting the last song one of the prostitutes walked out on stage and flicked a cigarette at me.... Of course it ignited my legs in an instant! I tried to fan it out really quickly and it managed to catch her hair on fire as well!
She started flipping out and we were both running around the stage trying to put each other out, she slipped and fell and her bewbs flew out! The crowd went absolutely ape-sh+t!! She jumped up flailing all around and that's when the cops tackled her and started chasing me!
I managed to jump up on top of a tall wall of speakers and fend them off for the last bit of the song.... Finished the solo and we were done!


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Cyrillic Sneer wrote:
Hookers bang for money for kids who are going to die soon, meanwhile the bands play on..... On fire that is!
Squincher came out balls to the wall, annihilating the audience with tight riffs and sleazy tones. I did not think by watching WHOREMOUTH set up that they looked able to sustain the crowd after that talent . . . But the ability to entertain never ceases to confuse us.
WHOREMOUTH (what a fitting name for this event btw) managed to not only set themselves on fire, but also one of the working girls as well. This led us to nudity violations, indecent exposure violations and evading police violations. The guitarist known only as SeXXX TaNK managed to fight fire with fire whilst climbing a wall of amps, evading the police chase, and still finish the bands closing solo.
It's a story you can't make up and is hard to put words to. The experience is real folks. Go see these bands!

This event sponsored by Squincher
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SeXXX TaNK out.
 
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