Big changes...
We had a member quit just a couple of days ago. I had predicted this change was coming (openly) about 2 months ago following an increasing level of dysfunction and passive-aggressive behavior.
The loss of our stellar #3 guitarist on March 18th was directly attributed to this member and their drama and his exit was a huge blow to our 6 piece group.
Every instance of drama in this band keeps coming back to this one member. Everyone else gets along famously.
He recently started a shouting match with the bassist over what key a song should be played in, insisting we use a capo because "That's how Steve Miller did it." We collectively wasted 40 minutes on that tirade.
He has made snide remarks to other members like, "We'll play it in this key so the bassist can play it," and "Wish I could just plug in and play like you," berating me because I am the only member driving 85 miles one way to rehearsal (everyone else lives less than 30 minutes from the rehearsal space) on Thursday nights after my studio job. There are many other passive-aggressive comments, too numerous to mention, but they have all contributed to this black cloud effect.
On one recent occasion, he refused to help the bass player when he (openly) asked for help working out a problem with monitor function before a performance, saying "We'll, guess you know how I felt all those years being the only one hooking up the PA." This remark didn't even make sense because he had told the other members that he didn't want anyone else setting up the PA.
Now here's the back story...
This member - and actually our founder - became disillusioned with our female lead singer after he jumped her in front of the entire band (in March) completely inappropriately, shouting "F**k You," after she confronted him about disrespecting another band member, and she literally (verbally) backed him up into a corner.
She is not easy intimidated. I believe the founder - at that point - "turned up the heat" to try and push the singer out of the group, in hopes of bringing in someone that he could control. But his efforts to drive her out of the band failed.
Some people are nice folks to hang out with, but can be extremely difficult to work with in a working band, especially one that is being run as a business and not a hobby.
The singer had already approached me (a few weeks ago) about leaving to get away from the increasing hostility, and the other members all agreed we had a good thing going and that the rest of us should move forward together.
Before we could meet and vote on an exit strategy, the founder resigned Saturday via text from outside the country, whilst on vacation, saving us a lot of time and effort.
We had a band meeting last night and began implementation of much needed changes to change course and bring in a replacement guitarist.
I'm feeling like the weight of the world has been lifted off all of us.
A great band just got better...
