LiveeviL2000
Ambassador of Pentagonal Pentatonics
TTR Game of Toanz
- Thread starter TVvoodoo
- Start date
OP
TVvoodoo
Ambassador of The Comfortably Slung
Go ahead, but lets hope it is not a premonition of round 14 for you.
I was pretty sure Thunderskull was KO'd. So I was getting ready to say goodbye.
@4406Pack - it might not be shareable by anyone but me... so here it is.
I wish I would have had to time to edit it for Sexxx Tank, he deserved a better send-off
I am glad you remain in the game. You continue to surprise us all, Thunder Skunk
I was pretty sure Thunderskull was KO'd. So I was getting ready to say goodbye.
@4406Pack - it might not be shareable by anyone but me... so here it is.
I wish I would have had to time to edit it for Sexxx Tank, he deserved a better send-off
I am glad you remain in the game. You continue to surprise us all, Thunder Skunk
Last edited:
LiveeviL2000
Ambassador of Pentagonal Pentatonics
Chapter 13
This creepy dude from Legit Rekkerds introduces himself as Charles Worthington III, but he says to call him Chaz. The guy seems like a complete tool, but he offered us a record deal and the promise of fame and fortune. Plus, upfront cash!!!!
Before we signed, we had a couple of demands of our own.
Section 13.4.21a – Legit Rekkerds will supply Barbarian Bob 4 grams of “White Powder of Greatness” per day.
Section 16.11.6b - Legit Rekkerds will cover the cost of penicillin and any other treatments needed by members of Brutal Sex for STDs and or any other infections/diseases contracted on tour.
Section 24.1.45d - Legit Rekkerds will provide a dozen “willing” females at every venue which do not include, Whatsername, Bobbie, and Gizzelle.
Once we signed on the dotted line, the first thing we bought was a van, not just any van … The VAN! As soon as we got it, we all got inside and started singing the A-Team theme song!!! “Da dada Daaaa da da daaaaaaaa ….” ok we don’t know the words to the A-Team theme song … but who does?!?
We promptly put our logo on it. It gets terrible gas mileage, but its got a kickazz sound system and fog lights!!
With the cash Chaz gave us, we decided to throw a little celebration get together for a few of our closest friends. Of course Whatsername, Bobbie, and Gizzelle came and they invited a few people and they told two friends, and so on, and so on ….
But it didn’t matter, we had plenty of White Powder of Greatness to go around! Then somebody brought some mushrooms and Barbarian Bob had to try some, along with “Powder of Greatness” and the girls had some little pill with an “e” on it. Yup, Barbarian Bob was feeling no pain. Then some guy came up and said he was our biggest fan, and he wasn’t kidding! He said his name was Pat Carroll and he wanted to work for us. To be perfectly honest, with Big Petey on board, this guy wouldn’t fit in the van! Plus he was making the girls cry and he didn’t fit the Brutal Sex image. He looked alien in nature, that’s when it hit Barbarian Bob! We gave our old friend Thunder Skull a call and told him we had the perfect guy to fill in for his roadie spot or anything else for that matter! Thunder Skull being a complete weirdo from the planet Psycho agreed to take him on as Last Resort’s Roadie.
The next morning, Barbarian Bob woke up on the roof of the van with 2 sheep. He was sporting a brand new tattoo. any looking confused.
Barbarian Bob really don’t know what Barbarian Bob was doing with the sheep up there. But what is puzzling is …. where the hell did the sheep come from?!?! Everything else about the party is a blur.
This creepy dude from Legit Rekkerds introduces himself as Charles Worthington III, but he says to call him Chaz. The guy seems like a complete tool, but he offered us a record deal and the promise of fame and fortune. Plus, upfront cash!!!!
Before we signed, we had a couple of demands of our own.
Section 13.4.21a – Legit Rekkerds will supply Barbarian Bob 4 grams of “White Powder of Greatness” per day.
Section 16.11.6b - Legit Rekkerds will cover the cost of penicillin and any other treatments needed by members of Brutal Sex for STDs and or any other infections/diseases contracted on tour.
Section 24.1.45d - Legit Rekkerds will provide a dozen “willing” females at every venue which do not include, Whatsername, Bobbie, and Gizzelle.
Once we signed on the dotted line, the first thing we bought was a van, not just any van … The VAN! As soon as we got it, we all got inside and started singing the A-Team theme song!!! “Da dada Daaaa da da daaaaaaaa ….” ok we don’t know the words to the A-Team theme song … but who does?!?
We promptly put our logo on it. It gets terrible gas mileage, but its got a kickazz sound system and fog lights!!
With the cash Chaz gave us, we decided to throw a little celebration get together for a few of our closest friends. Of course Whatsername, Bobbie, and Gizzelle came and they invited a few people and they told two friends, and so on, and so on ….
But it didn’t matter, we had plenty of White Powder of Greatness to go around! Then somebody brought some mushrooms and Barbarian Bob had to try some, along with “Powder of Greatness” and the girls had some little pill with an “e” on it. Yup, Barbarian Bob was feeling no pain. Then some guy came up and said he was our biggest fan, and he wasn’t kidding! He said his name was Pat Carroll and he wanted to work for us. To be perfectly honest, with Big Petey on board, this guy wouldn’t fit in the van! Plus he was making the girls cry and he didn’t fit the Brutal Sex image. He looked alien in nature, that’s when it hit Barbarian Bob! We gave our old friend Thunder Skull a call and told him we had the perfect guy to fill in for his roadie spot or anything else for that matter! Thunder Skull being a complete weirdo from the planet Psycho agreed to take him on as Last Resort’s Roadie.
The next morning, Barbarian Bob woke up on the roof of the van with 2 sheep. He was sporting a brand new tattoo. any looking confused.
Barbarian Bob really don’t know what Barbarian Bob was doing with the sheep up there. But what is puzzling is …. where the hell did the sheep come from?!?! Everything else about the party is a blur.
4406Pack
Ambassador of Soothsayer
Chapter 13 Legit Rekkerds
Well We had a Meeting with Legit Rekkerds the Sleezy Manager Ben Dover was almost to much to Handle but we managed
We ended Up signing But added a Few demands of our Own
1.1 amendment 2 a
Legit Rekkerds will supply unlimited amounts of Element 115 for Thunderskulls TR-3B
1.3.4 Amendment ThunderSkull will Always where his Costume No matter what event or charity is he is scheduled to appear at by self or with Band. Changes Legit rekkerds requirements for a full face photo of each band member
1.5 .6
No liquor or Drugs in thunder skulls presence
Over rides legit rekkerds supplies all party favors for band clause
When we signed we needed a new van to hall the gear to the shows so the band bought
What an absolute awesome Ride
Next up on the venu was trying to repay Brutal sex for the absolute 0 they sent us for a roadie and tech wizzard so we sent over Bruce
He said he couldn’t wait to Show Barbarian BoB his Thor’s Hammer
They absolutely couldn’t refuse the way we talked bruce up and excepted him with open arms
We then had John Wick Rent out the Red Circle and through a Bash for about 600 fans
I also had to go back where it really started for me and got a tattoo to remind memof my trip through Buckethead Land
The Bash was a Huge success we living Large
LastResort!
Well We had a Meeting with Legit Rekkerds the Sleezy Manager Ben Dover was almost to much to Handle but we managed
We ended Up signing But added a Few demands of our Own
1.1 amendment 2 a
Legit Rekkerds will supply unlimited amounts of Element 115 for Thunderskulls TR-3B
1.3.4 Amendment ThunderSkull will Always where his Costume No matter what event or charity is he is scheduled to appear at by self or with Band. Changes Legit rekkerds requirements for a full face photo of each band member
1.5 .6
No liquor or Drugs in thunder skulls presence
Over rides legit rekkerds supplies all party favors for band clause
When we signed we needed a new van to hall the gear to the shows so the band bought
What an absolute awesome Ride
Next up on the venu was trying to repay Brutal sex for the absolute 0 they sent us for a roadie and tech wizzard so we sent over Bruce
He said he couldn’t wait to Show Barbarian BoB his Thor’s Hammer
They absolutely couldn’t refuse the way we talked bruce up and excepted him with open arms
We then had John Wick Rent out the Red Circle and through a Bash for about 600 fans
I also had to go back where it really started for me and got a tattoo to remind memof my trip through Buckethead Land
The Bash was a Huge success we living Large
LastResort!
LiveeviL2000
Ambassador of Pentagonal Pentatonics
I came close to picking the Mystery Machine.
but it wasn't ...
METAL TO THE CORE!!! \nn/
but it wasn't ...
METAL TO THE CORE!!! \nn/
LiveeviL2000
Ambassador of Pentagonal Pentatonics
You better have a bunch of Scooby snacks for your new roadie
LRT
Well-Known Member
Our buddy bones mentioned last rehearsal that he had been talking to a buddy of his. Said he worked in this promoting agency down on Pipe St. TThe agency's name was
Lagit Rekkerds in the slum part of town. Garbage covered the streets consisting of needles and tinfoil. We wwalking in and there's people passed out on the floor beer bottles everywhere. Bones takes us trough this mess and myself and I'm sure the band are thinking WTF. We go through this door down across from the bathroom and bones walks up to this creepy looking dude and said this is Charlie our new associate. I take a good look at him and think this guy is crazy. We get talking to him for a few minutes about terms and money and Charlie says. I notice that you gear and transportation are pretty run down and Lagit Rekkerds would like to front you $50,000 to get you back in tip top shape. I'm thinking ya right then he pulls out a safe box and starts counting $100 bills. That's when I notice there's $10,000 bill wraps on them and he hands us 5 of them.
The freaky terms we discussed
1
Is we had to let our packages swing/flop freely without complaints.
2
If we needed a place to crash from parting we were welcom to. BUT everyone could take a go.
3
What happens in Lagit Rekkerds stays in Lagit Rekkerds no questions asked
We took the $50,000 and started with transportation we needed a van and not just any van. We found this sharp looking VW bus and just had to have it. All the bells and whistles you could imagine, even had swamp coolers for the windows not shown in pic.
So one day the band was hanging out and there was this horrific smell coming from the bush. We all go walking down thinking we'd find a body but nothing. That's when we herd some groves come from this little cave, man the sound quality was perfect. We began to climb down in and were run out by this hairy almost naked dude. So we thought maybe we could use a raw chicken to lure. He came out and man he was hard to catch stronger than an OX. After getting him under control I think man Squancher could really use this guy for a roadie/sound guy. I contact Sqauncher and tell him I'll send over someone to help on tour and Squancher accepted the offer. Come to find out this burley bastards name was Samaqanch.
So then we were told we had to through a party with $10,000 of the money we were fronted. It was a hell of a party all the drugs and alcohol you could consume. It went a little like this
Then there was the part of getting a tattoo. Never got one before so it needed to feel like it had a meaning to the life style live hard and die harder. This is what I chose.
Dick Burns
Lagit Rekkerds in the slum part of town. Garbage covered the streets consisting of needles and tinfoil. We wwalking in and there's people passed out on the floor beer bottles everywhere. Bones takes us trough this mess and myself and I'm sure the band are thinking WTF. We go through this door down across from the bathroom and bones walks up to this creepy looking dude and said this is Charlie our new associate. I take a good look at him and think this guy is crazy. We get talking to him for a few minutes about terms and money and Charlie says. I notice that you gear and transportation are pretty run down and Lagit Rekkerds would like to front you $50,000 to get you back in tip top shape. I'm thinking ya right then he pulls out a safe box and starts counting $100 bills. That's when I notice there's $10,000 bill wraps on them and he hands us 5 of them.
The freaky terms we discussed
1
Is we had to let our packages swing/flop freely without complaints.
2
If we needed a place to crash from parting we were welcom to. BUT everyone could take a go.
3
What happens in Lagit Rekkerds stays in Lagit Rekkerds no questions asked
We took the $50,000 and started with transportation we needed a van and not just any van. We found this sharp looking VW bus and just had to have it. All the bells and whistles you could imagine, even had swamp coolers for the windows not shown in pic.
So one day the band was hanging out and there was this horrific smell coming from the bush. We all go walking down thinking we'd find a body but nothing. That's when we herd some groves come from this little cave, man the sound quality was perfect. We began to climb down in and were run out by this hairy almost naked dude. So we thought maybe we could use a raw chicken to lure. He came out and man he was hard to catch stronger than an OX. After getting him under control I think man Squancher could really use this guy for a roadie/sound guy. I contact Sqauncher and tell him I'll send over someone to help on tour and Squancher accepted the offer. Come to find out this burley bastards name was Samaqanch.
So then we were told we had to through a party with $10,000 of the money we were fronted. It was a hell of a party all the drugs and alcohol you could consume. It went a little like this
Then there was the part of getting a tattoo. Never got one before so it needed to feel like it had a meaning to the life style live hard and die harder. This is what I chose.
Dick Burns
LiveeviL2000
Ambassador of Pentagonal Pentatonics
Day 1 with Mad Bad Rob:
Woke up to the sound of a bugle playing revellie at 5am. We just passed out an hour ago.
Maybe we should have kept the mutant from the party.
Barbarian Bob is not happy. He scared the sheep
Woke up to the sound of a bugle playing revellie at 5am. We just passed out an hour ago.
Maybe we should have kept the mutant from the party.
Barbarian Bob is not happy. He scared the sheep
4406Pack
Ambassador of Soothsayer
How’s bruce an his Thor’s Hammer
That dude you sent us ate all the scooby snacks in 15 mins
LiveeviL2000
Ambassador of Pentagonal Pentatonics
Bruce aka”The Dragon Queen” keeps to itself mainly. Loves KFC chicken for some weird reason and the “hammer” is pieced and studded too.
My crew looks so weird.
Big Petey
Mad Bad Rob
Bruce
So weird!
mcblink
Ambassador of Riffs & Spliffs
One day at rehearsal, during breaktime, there was a knock at the door. When I went to see who it was, there was a skeezy lookin guy there. He seemed irritated.
"Can I help you?" I asked. "Yeah, maybe. This is where FiveSkin rehearses?" he asked. He reached into his chest pocket and pulled out a copy of the goatse EP. "My name is Wally. Wally Paulnuttz. I'm an executive at Legit Rekkerds, and we think this is great. The music, the cover art, it's a goldmine. Can we have a chat?"
After some negotiation, we were able to come up with a deal. A friggin' record deal! We had finally done it. We were gonna be stars. There were 3 stipulations to this deal though, we were now held by contract to abide by them. It was pretty easy to remember, they wanted us to have as much sex as possible, consume as much drugs as possible, and to rock and roll as much as humanly possible, thereby producing several albums a year. With a $50k incentive waved in front of our faces, we all eagerly took the bait, and signed the dotted line. Pretty sure a couple of us might have signed it for free, just for the sex and drugs, but that's another story.
After Wally left, we were stunned. So the first thing we did was throw a party. It. was. awes......well, it's better to watch the video.
A week later after we had all recovered, we went a picked out a new van to carry our rock star asses and gear around in. Found a nice one that came with a complimentary slut. We like sluts. Sluts are good. We'll take it.
While we were there, someone pointed out my tattoo. I don't have any tattoos though? I looked in the mirror to reveal just how whacko that party was!
Some party! Gettin' my mug inked up and not even knowing it! Crazy! Turns out the guy who noticed it was a roadie in need of work. I told him that we already had a full crew. It was a dirty lie, but the guy looked like a freak and he was rather annoying. I politely informed him that another local act, Wasteland of Sleep, could use him. His personality might wake them up a little bit, and they may transform into "Productive Awareness" instead. I think he said his name was Ruby Rhod Gobbler. I think he'll fit right in.
So here we are. My band is making progress.
How are your guys' bands doin'?
"Can I help you?" I asked. "Yeah, maybe. This is where FiveSkin rehearses?" he asked. He reached into his chest pocket and pulled out a copy of the goatse EP. "My name is Wally. Wally Paulnuttz. I'm an executive at Legit Rekkerds, and we think this is great. The music, the cover art, it's a goldmine. Can we have a chat?"
After some negotiation, we were able to come up with a deal. A friggin' record deal! We had finally done it. We were gonna be stars. There were 3 stipulations to this deal though, we were now held by contract to abide by them. It was pretty easy to remember, they wanted us to have as much sex as possible, consume as much drugs as possible, and to rock and roll as much as humanly possible, thereby producing several albums a year. With a $50k incentive waved in front of our faces, we all eagerly took the bait, and signed the dotted line. Pretty sure a couple of us might have signed it for free, just for the sex and drugs, but that's another story.
After Wally left, we were stunned. So the first thing we did was throw a party. It. was. awes......well, it's better to watch the video.
A week later after we had all recovered, we went a picked out a new van to carry our rock star asses and gear around in. Found a nice one that came with a complimentary slut. We like sluts. Sluts are good. We'll take it.
While we were there, someone pointed out my tattoo. I don't have any tattoos though? I looked in the mirror to reveal just how whacko that party was!
Some party! Gettin' my mug inked up and not even knowing it! Crazy! Turns out the guy who noticed it was a roadie in need of work. I told him that we already had a full crew. It was a dirty lie, but the guy looked like a freak and he was rather annoying. I politely informed him that another local act, Wasteland of Sleep, could use him. His personality might wake them up a little bit, and they may transform into "Productive Awareness" instead. I think he said his name was Ruby Rhod Gobbler. I think he'll fit right in.
So here we are. My band is making progress.
How are your guys' bands doin'?
And a big laugh for the roadie/ guitar tech/ sound man … lol
I can still hear that whining obnoxious voice of his.. lol
mcblink
Ambassador of Riffs & Spliffs
FHLOSTON PARADISE LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
LRT
Well-Known Member
I like that van but I've always had a soft spot for VWs
SG John
Ambassador of Cool Guitars and Amps.
At our last show, we were approached by a talent scout for Legit Rekkerds. HE wanted up to speak with his boss. The next day we went to this warehouse, and met with Sleazy Martini. He gave us the creeps. As he talked at us, not with us, he started flashing piles of money trying to impress us.
As we were trying to come to terms, we had a few demands such as
1. A minimum of two interpretive dancers on stage at all times, and on the payroll.
2. A liquid light show.
3. No solid state backline amps.
His weird rules included:
1. No drugs or hard liquor (Said nothing about mushrooms or weed).
2. Had to have a healthy diet on the rider.
3. Stage make had to not be tested on animals.
After we got stuff sorted, and some money in the bank account, we bought a new van. It has some oomph to the engine, so pulling a trialer should not be a problem.
To celebrate, decided to throw a bash. Bobbie and Giselle invited some friends. Unfortunately, they each told two friends, and they told, and so on, and on.... until it got way out of hand. We tried out the new light show, and some of the body paint.
I don't know who invited the very annoying creepy guy that kept saying he was the best sound man in town. Never heard of him, nor any of the bands he supposedly worked with. Finally, I decided that Whore Mouth could probably use a Fluffer, and gave him Sexxx Tank's phone number and address. Told him to hurry before they head off on tour.
Speaking of the light show and body paint, and other stuff going on the bash, Mr. Martini hired a tattooist to sling ink at the party. I woke up the next day with some really bad ink, and wished it was body paint. I don't know how it got there. I do not remember that part of the party at all.
As we were trying to come to terms, we had a few demands such as
1. A minimum of two interpretive dancers on stage at all times, and on the payroll.
2. A liquid light show.
3. No solid state backline amps.
His weird rules included:
1. No drugs or hard liquor (Said nothing about mushrooms or weed).
2. Had to have a healthy diet on the rider.
3. Stage make had to not be tested on animals.
After we got stuff sorted, and some money in the bank account, we bought a new van. It has some oomph to the engine, so pulling a trialer should not be a problem.
To celebrate, decided to throw a bash. Bobbie and Giselle invited some friends. Unfortunately, they each told two friends, and they told, and so on, and on.... until it got way out of hand. We tried out the new light show, and some of the body paint.
I don't know who invited the very annoying creepy guy that kept saying he was the best sound man in town. Never heard of him, nor any of the bands he supposedly worked with. Finally, I decided that Whore Mouth could probably use a Fluffer, and gave him Sexxx Tank's phone number and address. Told him to hurry before they head off on tour.
Speaking of the light show and body paint, and other stuff going on the bash, Mr. Martini hired a tattooist to sling ink at the party. I woke up the next day with some really bad ink, and wished it was body paint. I don't know how it got there. I do not remember that part of the party at all.
