Horrifying suggestion coming up...
I mean truly and spectacularly frightening...
Now... I am going to preface this by saying that a LP is a guitar of many many gods, and a terrific and worthy choice.
But...
And again, this is scary...
Find a way to try a PRS SC 594...
I know I know... not the face mate!

OK... I've moved back about 15 feet, just in case...
I'm serious though... just TRY it. Just once.
I know lots of guys that did it, and never regretted it.
Feels/sounds like heresy doesn't it?
Yeah, but maybe... just maybe it might be good!
Maybe not, but you'd know for sure after... right?
I am going to run away now, cuz I can see the stink eye just as good as the next wanker.