Thieving Bastards!

mcblink

Ambassador of Riffs & Spliffs
So I decided to hit the hay a bit earlier than usual...I'm about almost asleep....wife comes in, lays down, looking at her phone when all of a sudden we hear a loud thwack right outside of the bedroom window. We've had problems with thieves before, so I was semi prepared for this...I jumped up, put my shorts on, grabbed my spotlight and hopped in the truck...looking for the son of a bitch who just stole my wife's bike...bastard must have heard me coming for him...I drove every street and every alley for several blocks, but he eluded me. I get home and the wife is already on the phone with the cops, before I had even parked 3 units were pulling up to the house....and off they went looking for him. He had better be thankful when the cops roll up on him that it wasn't me instead. I already have a plan for the next thief I catch in my yard, and I'm pretty sure he'd prefer jail to what I have in store. My plan involves a knee or two that look like Nancy Kerrigan's, some 4ft long zip ties and a telephone pole. I'm intercourse pissed. 'Twas just a shitty old bicycle, but it's not theirs to take! He could have taken my shovel, and I would be equally as pissed! Guess I'll be up for a bit longer now, trying to chill out enough to sleep again, but I'll probably just be too wound up about it for the rest of the night.

I HATE thieves with a passion.

Hell, maybe I'm lucky I didn't find him....and do something too regrettable..
 
So I decided to hit the hay a bit earlier than usual...I'm about almost asleep....wife comes in, lays down, looking at her phone when all of a sudden we hear a loud thwack right outside of the bedroom window. We've had problems with thieves before, so I was semi prepared for this...I jumped up, put my shorts on, grabbed my spotlight and hopped in the truck...looking for the son of a bitch who just stole my wife's bike...bastard must have heard me coming for him...I drove every street and every alley for several blocks, but he eluded me. I get home and the wife is already on the phone with the cops, before I had even parked 3 units were pulling up to the house....and off they went looking for him. He had better be thankful when the cops roll up on him that it wasn't me instead. I already have a plan for the next thief I catch in my yard, and I'm pretty sure he'd prefer jail to what I have in store. My plan involves a knee or two that look like Nancy Kerrigan's, some 4ft long zip ties and a telephone pole. I'm intercourse pissed. 'Twas just a :poo:ty old bicycle, but it's not theirs to take! He could have taken my shovel, and I would be equally as pissed! Guess I'll be up for a bit longer now, trying to chill out enough to sleep again, but I'll probably just be too wound up about it for the rest of the night.

I HATE thieves with a passion.

Hell, maybe I'm lucky I didn't find him....and do something too regrettable..
That sucks.

I once had a guitar stolen, one that was special to me soI know the feeling all too well.
 
Over the last several years I've had a dirtbike, an outboard motor, a laptop, a weed whacker, tools, two bicycles, a trailer for pulling kids behind the bicycles...and probably a few things I didn't even notice yet get stolen.

I can't believe how brazen these subhuman peices of human trash are getting. Coming right into my yard.
 
So I decided to hit the hay a bit earlier than usual...I'm about almost asleep....wife comes in, lays down, looking at her phone when all of a sudden we hear a loud thwack right outside of the bedroom window. We've had problems with thieves before, so I was semi prepared for this...I jumped up, put my shorts on, grabbed my spotlight and hopped in the truck...looking for the son of a bitch who just stole my wife's bike...

Put a "bait" bike out front with a Vaselined front rim and loosen the front axle nuts. It will be fun...
 
What I need to do is just move out of this place. It's a house on a corner lot, so we've got a pretty decent sized yard... but it's wide open to the street. No fence, no bushes, no nothing....it's exceedingly easy for someone to walk by in the dark and just quickly grab whatever isn't tied down. Been here 6 years, but I rent, I don't actually own the place, so getting a fence erected would be quite a challenge. But if I could have a fence I could leave my dogs out there and I'm very sure we wouldn't have any more theft problems. We have the cowdog Roxy Anne, who is barky enough to give ample warning to the thief and alert me...and the big ol German Shepherd, Khan, who would likely cause immediate poopy pants to whomever sees him giving chase. But they don't do too much good from inside the house aside from the barking.

Also, had I not decided that I was tired and went to bed early, there's a good chance I would have caught him in the act. I'm often outside after dark slinking around in the shadows myself.

One guy walked almost right up to me to look through my trashcan at 5am...little did he know that I was there, in the dark, having a morning smoke...when I confronted him he gave me some BS about how he has a mental condition that compels him to "lift the lids on all the trashcans I walk by"... I just told him that if he knew what was best for him, he'd just keep walking away
 
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Sorry to hear of dirtbags preying on you.
I wrote some stuff and deleted it to avoid political comments.
This country has gone completely mad.

Maybe a long cable with a lock fished through what can be tied down at least slows them or makes noise enough they move on.
I was gonna say string the perimeter with beer cans on trip lines to clatter when breached, then claymores 5 yards inside that, but, well...
it gets kinda Bill Murray and the gophers after that.

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Sorry to hear of dirtbags preying on you.
I wrote some stuff and deleted it to avoid political comments.
This country has gone completely mad.

Maybe a long cable with a lock fished through what can be tied down at least slows them or makes noise enough they move on.
I was gonna say string the perimeter with beer cans on trip lines to clatter when breached, then claymores 5 yards inside that, but, well...
it gets kinda Bill Murray and the gophers after that.

View attachment 45484
I'm all for it man. The cops really can't do a whole lot about it. Seems stupid really, but their hands are somewhat tied, especially if they want to make a case, and have it stick.

A few years back, we had a thief in the area, he was well known and not a first time offender. He was running around the countryside at night stealing from farmers, and the cops just couldn't do much more about it. He'd been arrested and released several times already. They needed a large theft, or something more in order to keep him in the clink.

So a bunch of these guys went and armed themselves, kicked the dude's door open and began to repo all their stolen goods....sent the message loud and clear...that thief ran far away to Alaska, where I'm sure he kept being a massive :poo:stain...and hopefully got eaten by a bear.
 
Yeah that reminds me, I did have a gas jug stolen from here too, 5gal, of course it was full...

I put up trail cams and baited for a while, but nothing ever came of it.

I've placed big sticks that would make excellent clubs in strategic places all around the yard

I once wrapped up in a camo blanket and spent the night under a lilac bush waiting for some dick to take the bait

Once LRT and I posted up in the Chevy 20 van I have parked in the back, and waited for the thief...

All fruitless efforts. Last night was probably the closest I have come yet, aside from the dude trying to sift through my trash...
 
I too have had a bunch of things go missing, some could be my fault for not locking them down in the back of my truck, and I am also a corner lot, have had my drivers window broken out and they found my garage door opener.
The poor sumbitch that gets caught in my garage, is going to wish he had never stepped foot in my garage!
Cheers
 
Back in the early 70's I was playing at a local dive, break time roll's around and I set my 1957 Sunburst Les Paul Jr. on the stand. Just a couple minutes later I hear a bit of a scuffle going on, when I turned around my Jr. was gone. Some of patrons went after the guy but to no avail., the Jr. was gone. I'm still looking for it, but pretty sure I'll never see it again. :cry:
 
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